THE ART OF LETTING GO

Last weekend was the best weekend I have ever had in my lifetime. It was somewhat paradoxical since I have not been into reflections and soul-searching much my entire life. For some weird reason, a friend sent me a message and wanted to meet with me to chitchat. And so we did.

Upon meeting, we had our usual exchanges - the common "how-are-you?", kisses, hugs and the eagerness to see a friend for ages. But not the things that 'friends with benefit' do, hell no!!!But it was nevertheless such a fun moment, like a saint on the verge of his epiphany.

And so, after our darn greetings, we decided to watch a movie - The Banquet starred by Zhang Ziyi. Loved it. Fell in love with it. Don't you just love the martial arts mixed with such ultimate grace? It was so refreshing to see people flying. And fighting. Flying and fighting at the same time. But of course, there's so much more than that. It's such done with great taste. I truly recommend it.

Well. On to my story.

Right after the movie, we decided to satisfy our tongues' urge for the Italian palate. Piadina became our witness for the conversation that became my eye-opener. Like me, She has gone thru a lot of risks. Risks that made her weigh her options and somehow choose the lesser evil. The lesser evil that would be more beneficial in dealing with life.

She mentioned her brother during our conversation over the quattro formagi (spell check, please), a thin-crust pizza made up of four kinds of cheese and carbonara on our table that somehow influenced her in a good way. She has made me realize things that are far more important and sort out my perspectives as well. I think it is my sole responsibility to impart that realization to you guys as these might help you go with the flow of life, and not go against it.

These are just some of the few good things to ponder:

1. Life is not all about career. Career is just a pseudo-goal most of us are preoccupied of. At twenty-something, we go thru the quarterly crisis. We compare ourselves to our peers and contemporaries, especially to those who became successful in their chosen careers, abruptly. You pity yourself for staying stagnant and become envious for people who seemed to be living their dreams.

What you must remember though is that God made plans for us. Plans that do not happen the same day or date your rival at school got his/her glory just as quick as exercising his/her knuckles.

WE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT A CAREER IS. We were just laid with the possibilities, just like picking a trinket in that wide-stretched stalls in Divisoria. Options. Meaning ephemeral. Not lasting.

At most times, we get drowned thinking 'what-might-have-beens' or 'what-could-have-beens'. Our shoulda, woulda, couldas. Our aspirations in life. We were placed in awkward situations we never ever thought possible. We encounter people and friends. Colleagues and acquaintances. Friends and foes. All for a reason.

Don't be that person who has a career but never ever got to live a life he wanted. Be that person who lived the life he wanted and eventually got a career in the process. Look within yourself and contemplate. If you don't know the skills that you're good at, stop looking. Begin honing and treasuring each experience you pick up along the way. It's not all about the career, it's the process of getting there that makes the experience worthwhile.


2. Learn to appreciate the littlest things. Cherish each experience. Don't be such a haste.
Remember that an experience, no matter how sweet or bitter is worth every pain and joy. Cherish every heartache. Every smile. Every giggle. Appreciate that you have two legs and ten toes. Appreciate and embrace what makes you YOU. Discover and rediscover. Remember what Friedrich Nietzche (I think it was him, not sure though. :) ) had said, "that doesn't kill you makes you stronger".

Life is not always walking on the rainbow. It's not about discovering the pot of gold at the end of it. Sometimes, you have to work double as hard to unearth something to expose its true beauty. Like a heartbreak, it's a given. But still, one chooses to love. It's not anticipating the heartbreak, but picking up the shattered pieces and glueing them all together after. It's not the before. It's the after that's more important.


3. Let go. Letting go of something is somewhat the best exercise to be free. Be free from constrictions. Free yourself from pressure. From emotions that tire you. From thoughts that wear you out.

Letting go of a dream is achieving your dream. Events unravel themselves to your advantage. Leave everything to the Lord and loosen up. I am not saying to slack off and bum around like a sloth. But instead, make short-term goals instead of the long-term ones.

Live life as it unfolds itself. Live life one step at a time. The future is the uncertain. The uncertainty of life is what spices it up. Don't strip yourself from that, you owe yourself at least that.